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The Four Rules of Love

Have you ever thought about what makes successful relationships tick? Is there a secret rule book that we don’t know about? 

Generally speaking, love doesn’t have a one size fits all kind of rule or approach. In love, rules are guidelines. They exist to establish and maintain the boundaries lovers set to help define the behaviours, attitudes, mindsets and language used in their specific relationship.

And, as every relationship comes with its own dynamics, there will never be a set of rules for love or finding love. However, you may find that the following guidelines can help you in building a healthy relationship.

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1. Time

You’ll find that there are those who go from meeting on their first date to getting married a few months later, and they’re still happily married 30 years down the line. Then, there are those who take it slow, get to know one another, until they decide whether or not being in a relationship would work for them.

There’s no right or wrong amount of time for you to date before you commit to someone. 

Whether you jump right in or wait, the choice is yours, so take the time you need.

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2. Trust

Trust is the binding glue of every healthy and successful relationship. No relationship can thrive where one or both partners are suspecting the other of infidelity, withholding information or not being truthful in general.

There are different ways of ensuring trust between you and your partner. One way is by being open and authentic about what is important to you and the relationship you want to lead.

3. Support

Support comes in many different forms – emotional, verbal and physical. 

Sometimes it can be difficult to provide the support someone needs, especially if you don’t fully understand the issue at hand. For example, during disagreements, it can be particularly difficult to see and understand another’s point of view. In this case, the best form of support you can offer is making your partner feel seen and heard. The other important bit is to offer support when and where you can.

4. Connection

It doesn’t matter how long you and your partner have been together, you both need to actively seek out connection. Most often, this means carving out time for each other to simply be together. Whether that’s lying on the couch doing nothing or talking about anything and everything. In this way, you both stay attuned to each other’s moods and thoughts. As well as your dreams, hopes, frustrations, or worries.

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As mentioned above, there is no one set of rules that fits all. Love is messy and fun, and everything in between. 

Any rules or guidelines involving love will vary between people and between relationships. No one size fits all, but you will find that having an understanding of each other’s needs, wants and values, actively building trust and offering each other support when and where you can, will help you build strong foundations for most relationships in your life.

Learn more about building healthy relationships with your partner, friends and family by joining the Lovedoc waitlist. You’ll receive launch updates and a sneak peek at the app.

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