Whether you’re looking for a partner or are already in a relationship, you’ll find that dating is a continuous process. It never really ends as there are always new things to explore within your relationship and with your partner.
So, whether you’ve been on a whole bunch of dates and still can’t find a real connection or have been together for years and are looking to take things to the next level, here are a few tips on how you can transform your love life.
1. Take initiative
If you have a burning question or want to try out something new, but are unsure of their response, ask. It takes a lot of courage, but in the end, the only way you’re going to find out is by taking the initiative. This goes for new dates and long-term lovers alike. There’s no point in playing cool or hard to get, so grab the bull by its horns and see what happens.
And with all that being said, if you don’t get the response you were hoping for, handle it gracefully. Maybe the other person is not ready or you’re at different stages in life that aren’t necessarily compatible. Whatever the reason may be, it often will have little to do with you and more with what’s going on in the other person’s life and head.
2. Be true to yourself
Don’t lose your life goals and ambitions or conform to everyone else’s expectations.
Whether you’re dating to find love or already are in a long-term relationship, you have your own needs and wants that need to be met. Of course, making space and time to meet your date’s or partner’s needs is also important, therefore finding a balance is key. Create a vision that you can share and work towards together, as well as some that are just for you.
Additionally, don’t let yourself be pressured into situations because you think that’s how it should be. Remain true to yourself and be authentic. There’s no point in putting on an act and appearing to be someone you’re not.
You will have read or heard this in many places, but good communication really can transform your love life.
Talk about what makes you happy, what bothers you, your highs and your lows. Share your experiences with your date and be curious about theirs. Maybe you’ll find more common ground or mutual interests that you hadn’t been aware of before.
4. Be honest
As they say: honesty is the best policy. And, in terms of your love life, it is a cornerstone of your relationship. Being transparent about what you want and how you feel is important, while also being considerate in how you approach sensitive topics. Of course, not everything will be black and white or have an easy explanation, but more often than not, it’s worth it.
It takes two to have a conversation, and good conversations are made up of people who actively listen to what the other is saying.
We can’t always be attentively listening 100% of the time, but in situations where you want to connect put all distractions – including your phone – aside and be present.
Show them you’re interested and are ready to listen and be there for them.
6. Pay attention to the little things
Become more aware of the small details that you may not have noticed initially. Noticing and remembering someone’s preferences makes them feel seen and heard. It’s a positive reflection on you and has the potential to transform any relationship in your life.
This also includes small gestures such as holding the door open or sending them a good morning or good night message.
7. Be open…
…to new experiences, suggestions, opinions, etc. It’s never easy to be presented or confronted with an idea that makes you feel uncomfortable. But taking the time to understand your date’s point of view or emotions is a great way of stepping out of your comfort zone and learning something new.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t disagree with them, but it’s an excellent learning experience from which both of you can grow and connect even more.
8. Respect each other’s time (together and alone)
This goes for long-term couples, as well as those on the journey to finding love. If you’ve decided on a time to meet up and hang out, then stick to it. If something comes up last minute, let them know as soon as you can, to show that you respect them.
Being considerate of each other’s time also means allowing your partner to have time for themselves. Our fast-paced way of life doesn’t often allow us to have a good self-care routine, which is vital to our well-being. So, if your partner has decided to take some me-time, respect that choice. Your relationship, whichever stage it’s in, can only benefit from it.
9. Invest in each other
Building a connection takes time. Invest in your relationship by making conscious efforts to organise and go on dates. Be active and regularly check in or message your date if you’re not able to find the time to meet up. This will show that you’re truly interested and invested in getting to know them better. And, if you’re already in a relationship, it offers your partner reassurance.
10. Have fun
Last, but certainly not least: have fun! Enjoy getting to know each other and go with the flow.
If you’re going on dates with someone new, choose locations that you know and where you feel comfortable. Not only will it make you seem more relaxed, but also more confident and you will be able to focus on your partner and, importantly, enjoy your time with them.
If you’re in a long-term, committed relationship, try out something new or surprise each other, for example, by inviting them out on a date to a new restaurant or trying out a new hobby. Find mutual interests that you can explore together.
Would you like to learn more about building healthy relationships in your life? Then sign up to the Lovedoc waitlist, where you’ll receive the newest updates about the app’s launch and receive a sneak peek at what to expect!